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| Dealing with Anti-American prejudice...; How do you do it?.... | |
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| Topic Started: Jun 28 2011, 04:09:33 AM (2,681 Views) | |
| sleepyzzz | Jun 28 2011, 04:09:33 AM Post #1 |
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So, the boyfriend has been in Perth for almost a week. He's getting along as well as possible; almost "starved to death" Sunday, because he didn't realize all the grocery stores would be closed. But, he's definatly already feeling lonely and alienated. He emailed me yesterday, and said that Australians hate U.S. Marines, and he's heard them being referred to as "baby-killers". This makes him uncomfortable, because, of course, he served in the Marines. Actually, the biggest reason for why he applied for the job in Perth, is because he had fond memories of it from when he got to visit during his service. I know a friend of a friend who's been in Perth for over 2 years now. I friended her on Facebook, and made a joke about how "...at least I'll be used to being called a Yankee, being that I've been living in North Carolina for the past 2 years"......Her reply was that I will be called "Septo", as in septic tank.....since "all Americans are full of shit". Now, I've been called a lot of things, but that'll be a new one  When I told my boyfriend this, he said to not tell him anymore, because he didn't want to have second thoughts  I was just wondering how everyone deals with situations like these. I'm looking for advice to give to my boyfriend. All I could say is that those people are ignorant, and he shouldn't take it personally. I just know, I KNOW, that if he opens his mouth to try to defend himself, someone is going to end up with a few less teeth.....and I really don't want him to get deported before I get out there. I told him please please please don't go drinking alone before I get there...... |
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| Pothole | Jun 28 2011, 08:55:41 AM Post #2 |
True Blue Mate
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Hey Sleepy, Really sorry that your boy friend is suffering such feelings at the moment and I hope that things get better for him as he settles in. The friend of a friend........ Seppo = Septic Tank which rhymes with Yank,unsure of the origin (and yes it possibly was for the association with the tanks function, I am unsure though). I have never heard anyone actually use this in real life through, although you used to see it in a few movies dealing with the war (ww2) and in those 70 era shows, I think everyone in the world suffered through. Out of interest where was he when he heard the Marines being referred to as "baby-killers"? this is pretty much beyond the pale and he should avoid the place there are a lot of great people in WA (a lot on this board) and some great associations and clubs. I have some good mates in WA, ex military and if you feel it would help him settle in a bit I would be happy to introduce you to them. What sort of work did you boyfriend take over there? Pothole |
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Those Who Lose Dreaming are Lost. Aboriginal Proverb A truly happy person is one who can enjoy the scenery on a detour Anon | |
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| Cristin | Jun 28 2011, 01:47:42 PM Post #3 |
True Blue Mate
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Remember that there are ignorant and insensitive people everywhere. Australians hear plenty of weird and offensive things when they go to the U.S., too ("do you ride kangaroos to work," etc.). My advice - don't come into this all worked up about people being anti-American or you're going to see it everywhere because you're looking for it. Remember that, whether you like it or not, you are an ambassador for the U.S. and you should try to exceed people's expectations. One of my favorite moments came one night when I was in a bar in Sydney with one of my American friends. We'd struck up a rapport with some Aussies, and one of them said to me ... "you confuse me. You're American. But, you're polite. But, you have a nose ring. I don't get you." Meaning, that he thought I was supposed to be loud and obnoxious, but I wasn't. I was probably the one American he met that day or week, and I did not meet his stereotype. So, hooray for little victories. That's not to say that there haven't been moments where my blood hasn't boiled at things I've heard said, but I keep telling myself that the U.S. is a very large country, and if anyone thinks they "know" me because they are lumping me in with 300 million other people, then they are the ones who are short-sighted. You'll find plenty, plenty of Australians who love America, too. Gotta let the bad roll off your back, and don't go looking for offense. |
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| Garrett | Jun 28 2011, 02:02:15 PM Post #4 |
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I'm really sorry about that, sleepy. I've experienced a little bit of negative American sentiments, myself, although not nearly as bad. Just some snide comments here and there, especially from some folks in my school program. To be honest, a lot of the negative sentiments appear to be borne out of ignorance and lack of experience or understanding. Case in point: my landlady's best friend was rabidly Anti-American, and she worried about even inviting him to the house anymore because she was worried he'd just give me a hard time. When we met, he was very civil of course--Australians are very good at being personable, I've found--but of course the small side comments started to come in, little digs here and there. Eventually we started having all-out discussions, and that was the best thing for both of us. As it turns out, what do you know, we agree on largely the same things and the things that aggravate him do the same to me. Also, his beliefs were based on a little misinformation and after some explanation, he could at least see a different side of things. So we're friends now, we get alone fine.  I think for a lot of people, the problem is viewing people in terms of their nationality. So I'd tell your boyfriend to just be a nice guy; try to let them see him as an individual, not an American. And if that still doesn't work then to hell with 'em, it's not worth dealing with jerks. (However over time things usually smooth out.) |
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| (provocateur) | Jun 28 2011, 03:04:02 PM Post #5 |
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You can't fight everyone. Unfortunately this is an acceptable prejudice in Australia and people don't think that they're being racist when they say things about Americans. There is a large minority of pretty seriously anti-American folk here - I'd put that figure at around one-third of the population. If they're going to announce their presence, they've identified themselves as people to avoid. If they want a little more, stick it to them. I do. Please don't think for a second that there is any reciprocity in how Australians are treated in the US. They are not insulted. They are worshipped, which makes the large undercurrent of hostility for us all of the more unpalatable. My wife in 10 years in the US never copped any stick for being an Aussie. The bigotry is one way, really. |
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| sleepyzzz | Jun 28 2011, 03:09:04 PM Post #6 |
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Thank you for all the responses. I, myself, am not really concerned too much about people being jerks. I've dealt with plenty of ignorant, and prejudice people here in the states. And, I've dealt with some persecution as well. I like myself, and that's all that matters I've never been much of a nationalist, and half of my family lives outside of America. So, as long as no one attacks me personally, I'll just ignore the anti-american comments; just like I've been ignoring the anti-New York comments and the anti-Iranian/Middle Eastern comments my whole life..... I totally get that we don't know very much in the States about Australia; just what we see in nature documentaries and movies. I've been reading as much as possible on the history and culture, and it's all very interesting. They've accomplished a lot in a very short time. Cristin: I absolutely agree with you; we ARE ambassadors. I look at this experience as, I am a guest to this country. It is a privelage to have that VISA. It is an honor to have a job waiting for me there. I'm really grateful for all of it. The funny thing is, I've dealt with misconceptions here in the states just between...the states! It's so funny how many people I've met outside of New York, who don't believe me when I say I've had chickens and ducks. When I smell manure, I think of spring...There are really so many things people assume about a person when they first see them, or only know a few things about them. It's nice when you meet people who are open-minded enough to have a conversation; and then we can all learn more about our world through eachother......and blah, blah unicorns and rainbows and stuff... Just wanted to get some ideas on advice to give to the boyfriend. Being an outsider isn't something he's used to. Pothole: I'm not sure where it was or who it was that made the anti-military comment. He hasn't ventured too far from Bicton. He's walked up and down Canning Hwy, and has taken the bus to Fremantle, and into the CBD. I'll ask him again if he'd like to be introduced to anyone; I think he's feeling a little overwhelmed at the moment. He and I are Sleep Technologists (Sleep Scientists, in Oz). The doctor of the Sleep Clinic we'll be working for hired my boyfriend to take over management, and he has just hired me as a clinician (didn't want me working for the competition). Thank you so much for offering your mates up :D Thank you everyone for sharing. I was worried about it becoming another "boo on Oz" thing, and I'm so glad it hasn't :D Provacateur: Yeah, I've never heard anyone over here say anything discouraging about Aussies. There ae some ignorant misconceptions, but nothing "mean". I've browsed some Aussie and British Ex-pat forums, and the Bigoted-Aussies can be pretty brutal; some of them even said they hate Canadians! Who could hate a Canadian?....oh, right...other Americans :P Really, if anyone wants to start trouble with me, they better be ready to have their balls handed to them. I have a reputation for being an intimidating woman  Or, is it an emasculating b*tch.....Really, guys I'm not worried, or discouraged :D My friend that told me about the Seppo thing loves Perth, and is really happy. I've not heard anything to hault my desire for the move Edited by sleepyzzz, Jun 28 2011, 03:33:33 PM.
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| incognito | Jun 28 2011, 03:20:05 PM Post #7 |
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Oh Sleepy - That stinks! I have been here 5 years and I don't think I have really run into that much or at all. Wondering if the FB friend was just taking the piss? It's hard to see nuances in writing/online sometimes. I know when I first moved here I was on edge waiting for anti-American sentiment, and I would have taken anything to heart. I never ran into it, and now I am totally comfortable being here and if I ran into it now I would not be as sensitive and would find it easier to deal with I think. Many Australians I have run into LOVE America. I wouldn't worry about it too much. |
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| sleepyzzz | Jun 28 2011, 03:55:34 PM Post #8 |
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That's great incognito yeah, the FB friend is working in the Mining industry. So, I'm assuming that she may be around some rough-neck types who apparently are lacking in manners Even though I've read some ugly things, I'm not under the impression that the whole country is like that And, it's not like I'm some perfect person who never speaks a discouraging word about anyone else. I just don't go out of my way to insult people in public. I just feel wicked bad, because the boyfriend is alone over there, and it's still another month till I can be with him I don't really think he's going to get into any fights. That's something I was teasing him about before he left
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| AmbroseChick | Jun 28 2011, 05:57:26 PM Post #9 |
True Blue Mate
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Sleepyzzz - I have a friend who lives up in Brisbane and she is married to a former Marine. PM me and I'll send along details for them to talk. |
| Check it out! Facebook page: Americans Living in Queensland | |
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| Kuningan | Jun 28 2011, 06:46:47 PM Post #10 |
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True Blue Mate
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I asked 3 Aussie friends at lunch today about "Seppo" and all three agreed that #1 it comes from the Cockney rhyming slang and is not really an Aussie thing, and #2 that no body says that these days. I'd never heard it before and now I've both read it in a book and in this discussion in the same week. Weird. I'd think it very uncommon. I've read anti- American things in the press and editorials and commentary that pissed me off but I've never encountered particular personal animosity for being American. |
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| sleepyzzz | Jun 28 2011, 07:15:09 PM Post #11 |
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That's so weird....I wonder why she felt it was relevent? I wonder what kind of people she is associating with? Maybe they're British or South African, but she's assuming they're Aussies? Thanks for doing the interviews and getting to the bottom of this. I'm a little dissapointed....I thought it was funny, and was kind of looking forward to it |
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| Pothole | Jun 28 2011, 10:33:51 PM Post #12 |
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True Blue Mate
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Manners pfffft I stubbed my toe and messed up my hair on the overburden heap last week and do you think I got any sympathy? I paid 5 quid for that do and no one cared. Ill mannered louts does not go near enought to sum it up. |
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Those Who Lose Dreaming are Lost. Aboriginal Proverb A truly happy person is one who can enjoy the scenery on a detour Anon | |
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| (provocateur) | Jun 28 2011, 10:55:54 PM Post #13 |
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Seppo is definitely Aussie derived from Cockney rhyme. |
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| Pothole | Jun 28 2011, 11:17:35 PM Post #14 |
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True Blue Mate
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Septic Tank - Cockney Rhyming Slang for Yank (Origin the UK) Seppo in etymology is a shortned form of the original Cockney, jury is still out as to if this originated in NZ or Australia during the 40's and 50's Either way our cousins and us have had some colourful terms in the past, luckily this one pretty much only lives on in old films and on the internet and not real life. Now of we were talking Pav then the Kiwi's and us have a real blue happening.......... Edited by Pothole, Jun 28 2011, 11:18:21 PM.
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Those Who Lose Dreaming are Lost. Aboriginal Proverb A truly happy person is one who can enjoy the scenery on a detour Anon | |
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| Kuningan | Jun 28 2011, 11:44:09 PM Post #15 |
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 I sail with a Kiwi - she gets VERY shirty on the subject of Pav.
Edited by Kuningan, Jun 28 2011, 11:44:30 PM.
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| Bindie | Jun 29 2011, 12:39:45 AM Post #16 |
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Like Kuningan, what pisses me off is the Anti-American media. Last October it was the wahhh wahhh wahh about the Americans bringing their commerical holidays over dribble. I was like on a rampage about it because I could CARE LESS if Halloween was taken up by Australia, but FOR GOD'S SAKE do it and do it RIGHT or just SHUT UP ABOUT IT. No wonder ppl were upset about it! No one understood the porch light THING. Or the ONLY ON HALLOWEEN not the WEEKEND BEFORE/AFTER thing. And then I was REMINDING EVERYONE that Halloween orginated from the UK and Americans only made in FUN. Or a few months ago when the papers were all like, AUSTRALIA SNUBBED AT ACADEMY AWARDS and everyone I know (Aussie's too) were all like, wtf??? In my experience and opinion, the anti-American comments in both the media and comments from people are based out of ignorance. If you've never spent any time in the US, then your only idea of a country and it's people is from the television. What's popular isn't always a good representation of America - CSI, Law & Order, etc. Just the other day I was at an information session about the new Costco opening in Canberra in July and one of the speakers said, "yah in some of the Costco's in America you can by a gun and your coffin at the same time!" I had to giggle because OMG HAHAHAHA, but then realised everyone just looked. . . concerned. LOL. The anti-American crap does exist, but I don't find it's common in the "real" world of work, shopping, day to day stuff. I think it happens to everyone, too, regardless of nationality. My Aussie friend lived in the UK for about 5 years and she heard similiar crap about Australia that I hear about America. I don't think Americans are all spechal snowflakes in regards to people being ignorant about them or their country. Again, everyone experiences things differently. There are past posts on here about how people have had difficulty making friends, found women to be distant and hard to get to know. Others have no problems at all. I've personally found people to be quite friendly and have a group of women with whom I get together often. Best to just come and see for yourself. Be open to it and try to not have too many preconceived notions. I will tell you that after awhile your life will seem to revolve around the washing line. Is it going to rain? Will I get home in time to bring the clothes in? Are they dry enough? Will I just finish them off in the dryer? Or is this just me? |
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| Stinky1138 | Jun 29 2011, 09:50:44 AM Post #17 |
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I moved. Couldn't handle the idiots living in Perth. Basically came down to leaving the city or i was going to leave my husband/Australia. I knew a lot of people for 2-3 years, lived there, associated, and worked with them during the year we lived in Perth and they STILL felt the need to make wild assumptions and accusations. I constantly got told i was wrong about things regarding the US, when some had never even been there. I've got a lot of anti-perth & anti-pom feelings from my experiences. It doesn't seem like much individually but all the little things can make someone go mad. We have a lot of good friends in WA still but i would never live there again. re bindie: i worry about the laundry too. |
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| Mimishuze | Jun 29 2011, 10:03:45 AM Post #18 |
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| Gone On a Lucky Country - My Blog About Moving to Australia | |
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| Kuningan | Jun 29 2011, 12:15:45 PM Post #19 |
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Ditto! It was heaven to stay with a friend in Houston with a full size washer/dryer last month. The utter miracle of washing AND drying a pair of jeans in under an hour. Just....magic. (as an apt dweller my laundry line is in the water heater closet - too small to hang the sheets in so those get draped on chairs in the living room. Only wash sheets if I'm sure no one will be coming over that day) Topic? Here's a quote from a comment in todays Perth News Now online site in regard to a tourist left in the water by a tour boat at the GBR: "Why is it always US tourists being left behind. do they not have a good grasp of the Queens english and understand a return to vessel instruction?" *sigh* Minor stuff but annoying to read. |
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| Mimishuze | Jun 29 2011, 02:58:10 PM Post #20 |
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When we were in the States last month for a visit, I gathered up my laundry from the week and a half we had already been there. I sighed, gauging it with my eyes and realising that it was at least three loads. That meant that it would be almost 2 hours in the washer for each load and then a day out on the line for each of them and so on and so forth. I went down into my M-I-Ls basement and fit the whole bit into one washing and drying load that was done in a couple of hours. Unreal... But sort of funny... |
| Gone On a Lucky Country - My Blog About Moving to Australia | |
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